Author: Chris Wild

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Exports from the North

It’s that time of year again. As we get ready for bonfire night over the weekend, we had a moments panic when we realised that we hadn’t imported our must haves; Black Peas and Parkin. With only 2 days to go and Black peas need soaking overnight, we had to get some in the post today. Thankfully… father to the rescue and our supply should be with us with a day to spare!

Life would be so much easier if I could go to any shop and actually buy things from up north! You’d think Asda would have them!

Ask for “Black Peas” and you get the response; “Black Eye Peas?”… ask for Parkin and you’re asked; “Long or Short Stay?”

You’ll notice no direct wiki link either for those terms – like that’s going to work! You’ll notice no pictures either! What is the world coming too?

See Also: What do you miss?

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Lords of Midnight

Dehumanizer has written a small write up of Lords of Midnight over on his site; Games of My Life.

He discusses the merits of the game when you consider it as a inspired epic.

See Also: Similarties to other Fantasy Stoires…

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Wikipedia Lord of the Rings

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The North-South Culinary divide…

Now that I’m on the topic of food…

There is a definite North/South divide in England when it comes to food.

Pudding, Chips, Peas, Gravy, and a fish.Firstly if we take the good old staple Chippy. It is very hard to find a chip shop that will sell , , or Sauce. The exception for curry sauce is chippies that are Chinese take aways. If you are lucky enough to find such a , they generally sell the gravy etc as an extra in a little cup. You get no chance of eating it to go… what ever happened to take out trays? Also the pies down south are awful, they generally seem to be plastic wrapped Pukka Pies, whereas in the north they tend to be fresh Hollands Pies. Worse yet is that they don’t sell Steak and Kidney puddings… and even if they did there’d be no tray for it, or gravy to pour over it. All supermarkets sell Hollands products in packs of 4… in the south – nothing. There are now a few Asda’s starting to stock their products, however on the whole I have to import my supplies.

Greggs is a pretty universal pie shop now, however there is a subtle difference depending where in the country you live. Greggs in Newcastle sell Ham and , but by the time you get to Manchester you can’t buy this. Manchester have decent , my particular favourite being Potato and Meat ( note the order ), however as you move south these are replaced with inferior pasties and the Potato and meat is not even available.

Seeded Batch Warburton’s bakery is a good northern baker. You can now get a small amount of their products in southern supermarkets. I recently found that sainsbury’s were selling their Seeded Batch which is just fantastic for sandwiches, but even better toasted. Other products that are a Warbutons must… Oven Bottoms and Toastie. Although beware, the Toastie loaf is generall taller than your toaster! 🙂




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Wikipedia Gravy, Mushy Peas, Curry, chip shop, Polystyrene, Pease pudding, Stottie cake, pasties

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Pretzels

Pretzels - yum yum yum!Continuing the thread of foods that I didn’t used to like but now do… … or more to the point Penn State Pretzels.

I used to love those chocolate covered ones… where did they go?





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Jilted Generation

Everyone seems to go on nowadays about the current degeneration of this generation…. s everywhere… we all know that it’s the previous generations fault, and because the problem is actually due to a lack of discipline and direction from the parents, then that means that the problem started many generations ago and all those Old cronies stood gaggling about the “Youth of today” wearing their and standing about on street corners… can rinse their hair safe in the knowledge that it is all their fault.

Anyway, more importantly than all this is the fact that I think the problem has manifested itself in .

Cat in mailbox We have a number of cats around our house, and when we moved in 4 years ago we inherited a cat with the house. I know that sounds odd, but the cat had been bought when the owners moved in to a brand new house 18 years prior and they were now moving to and coudn’t take the cat with them. So it seemed such a shame to us that the poor thing would get put down after such a good innings, that we decided to keep the cat. It lived another year before croaking it with age related internal problems. To be honest, the only thing the cat was good for was keeping the garden free of other cats. I guess their is some in there somewhere!

Now, to tie all this information together; when I was a lad cats used to shit in the soil and cover it over. Cats were considered a clean pet unlike a that will drop its load anywhere. But it seems that the hoody wearing of today is quite content to shit wherever it feels like and leave it for someone else to clean up. Sound familiar? Yes yes I know it’s only cat poo, but its actually a problem when you have little kids and worse still for babies and pregnant women. Cat poo is a carrier of . Not to mention the more important issue of your kids trailing cat shit around the house!!!!!

So is this a problem that has managed to jump species or are we looking at a more serious evolutionary problem? How long before we are giving ASBOS to cats?

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Wikipedia ASBO, hoodies, cats, Australia, irony, dog, feline, Toxoplasmosis

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